Tonight again, I lie awake
Keeping still and breathing softly,
Sleepless in the growing dark,
Feeling of a deepening ache.
We spoke “transitions” yesterday.
I don’t know what this pulsing means;
Tension mounting, throbbing pain;
I wish it all would go away.
Change becomes its own misery,
Holding too tightly to the past,
This pulse is transformation-
The pang of birthing this new me.