When The Chase Isn't Comfortable

Let's talk about chasing happiness, or more specifically, the chase!

This is a story of expectations. This is a story of reality. This is a story of how those two things are like ships passing in the night.

I'm not a runner, though for a brief time last year I tried to become one until my knees got bursitis. I may try again because I'm not going to let one setback knock me out of the game forever. The main reason I haven't yet is because I am tired all the time from just getting through a day. And also, I fell in love with an exercise bike.

I never did learn to love running like I learned to love biking. I wanted to know why people love it, but even after achieving what is termed "the runner's high," I really didn't have anything more than the gratification of doing something that was good for me.

Running is a chore of pushing past the first 15 minutes of feeling like death, until the body moves into the zone and breaks a healthy sweat. Then it feels like one can run forever, which is the kind of feeling you best not pay attention to and stick to your pre-set goal. Or not. ;)

I am going somewhere with this. The fact is, when the chase begins, it begins with hope and a whole lot of expectations. It then leads to a great deal of discomfort, which is really only conquered by stubbornness. Guess who has that in spades? Still, it's worth it, because in the end it leads to something better and something more than when the challenge was first accepted.

So here is what I want to say. I am chasing happiness like it's my job these days, but that isn't going to mean I am happy all the time. It's definitely not going to mean I'm comfortable. I expect it to be a very vulnerable undertaking. Vulnerability and comfort never get on well, so I usually don't sit them next to each other. But perhaps if we have some peace talks, they can learn to live in harmony? Let's see about that.

Oh, this will be fun!

Love,

Jamie

The Great Happiness Chase! Day 3.